The internet has a few depressing candidates to replace Comey as FBI director
Do you have no interest in investigating Donald Trump’s alleged ties to Russia?
Are you a terribly unqualified white man who was born into tremendous privilege?
Well, son, do we have the job for you.
On Tuesday, Trump fired James Comey, the director of the FBI which just so happens to be the agency looking into Russian interference in the 2016 presidential election, and the Trump campaign’s alleged ties to Russian operatives.
“A search for a new permanent FBI director will begin immediately,” read the official statement from the White House.
Don’t worry, Trump. Your search is already over.
A lot of people say Jared Kushner is too busy to add FBI director to his portfolio, but I’m sure Middle East peace is almost finished.
Conor Friedersdorf (@conor64) May 9, 2017
I, for one, am confident about the objectivity of future FBI Director Jared Kushner.
Meredith Shiner (@meredithshiner) May 9, 2017
Fuck. This means Jared’s running the FBI now doesn’t it.
Gideon Yago (@gideonyago) May 9, 2017
The funny (terrifying?) thing is that’s not even the scariest scenario the internet could imagine.
Rudy Giuliani cracks his knuckles & smiles that reptilian smile
Spencer Ackerman (@attackerman) May 9, 2017
“FBI Director Giuliani Announces New Charges for Hillary” – Fox News, 2018
Steve Silberman (@stevesilberman) May 9, 2017
Um, any other suggestions?
Somewhere in the West Wing, Ivanka Trump is preparing the press release announcing her promotion from First Daughter to FBI Director
Gloria Fallon (@GloriaFallon123) May 9, 2017
Actually this is probably the most qualified candidate of the bunch.
Lol, it’s funny because it’s a sign of our rapidly crumbling democracy. Remember kids, this is not normal. Sleep tight.